The Crack Between Worlds newsroom is still reeling after yet another blunder by rookie reporter and resident "Mr. Beefcake," Rob Skythrust. Witnesses say Rob mistook a sacred mermaid lagoon — the site of a royal ceremony — for a public swimming pool. The result? A full-bodied cannonball that sent shockwaves across the multiverse.

The incident unfolded yesterday afternoon when Rob, shirtless as always and armed with little more than a toothy grin, stumbled upon the lagoon while "scouting for story leads." Instead of realizing he had wandered into a royal gathering, Rob allegedly shouted, "Whoohoo! It's a watering hole!" before running full speed and launching himself into the water.

The resulting splash drenched dozens of mermaids, disrupted a solemn procession, and caused what one witness described as "the largest unplanned tidal wave in three centuries."

"I thought it was a watering hole," Rob later confessed, dripping wet and looking more confused than contrite. "It's been ages since I've had a dip in the creek. Nobody told me it was a royal thing."

Merfolk had gathered for the annual Blessing of the Scales, a deeply sacred ritual meant to honor the sea gods. Instead, the event turned into chaos when Rob's cannonball not only destroyed elaborate hairstyles but also scattered tiaras, tridents, and seashell bras across the shoreline.

"That wasn't a splash, that was a tidal wave!" complained Princess Nerina, who lost two pearl-encrusted combs and several attendants to the undertow.

The high priestess of the lagoon declared the waters "spiritually contaminated" and announced a month-long cleansing ritual. Local fishing villages were forced to evacuate after the wave knocked over half their boats.

And yet, sources claim at least three mermaids were caught giggling as Rob climbed out of the lagoon, flexing his waterlogged biceps for onlookers.

When pressed about the incident, Rob insisted the mix-up was innocent. "Look, I just wanted to cool off after a warm day," he explained. "Ponds don't usually sparkle this much, but I figured it was saltwater. Nobody said I couldn't take a dip."

Despite his excuses, palace guards confirmed that Rob was nearly arrested for "reckless beefcake behavior," though they eventually let him off with a warning after several young mermaids begged for his autograph.

The mermaid royal family has not ruled out legal action, though Dolly, our resident gossip and pie-baker, suggests the scandal could boost Rob's popularity. "Sugar, every time that boy does somethin' stupid, his fan club gets louder. He'll be sellin' beach towels by next week."

Rob, for his part, remains blissfully unaware of the uproar. As of press time, he was seen shirtless and unapologetic, practicing another cannonball at the CBW news station in a large tank for aquatic protagonists.

"Honestly, I don't think the mermaids can claim an entire lagoon for themselves. Of course I had to jump in," he said with a grin. "You wouldn't get mad at a bird for flying, would you?"